May 21

Sex for Fun and Profit—Part 2

In Brief— The author reaches back in memory to reveal a few of his adventures with sexuality during his tossed salad life.

Sex Is Popular Because It’s Centrally Located—

Once a long, long time ago I was a child who was, like most kids, curious about lots of things, not least sexuality and, more specifically, about my own sexuality. This is the tale of how my curiosity about sex led me to where I am today. It’s unique to me, but readers may see bits of themselves in this tale.

Sexuality Sends Forth a Bud—

In the 1930s, when a kid started asking questions like “Where does a baby come from?” enlightened parents gave the kid a book that was supposed to answer those questions. For me, a recitation on the sex life of an insect or basic human anatomy served only to raise more questions. But I didn’t ask.

It was a soft summer day when I was ready to see if the other kids were right in saying, “I peed in my pants when I came down the hill.” I ran and did a belly-flopper onto the Flexi-Flier and headed down the hill. It wasn’t long before the vibrations made me pee in my pants. Years later, I realized that it wasn’t pee…I was ejaculating. My sexuality was showing itself.

Like most pubescent youngsters, I was critical of what I saw as my physical shortcomings. “I’m too skinny.” “My scrawny legs don’t have big muscles.” So what did I do? I read sex manuals on female anatomy and how to sexually satisfy a woman. On finding an upper body exercise device in my dad’s closet, I began working out. I was so compulsive that my alarmed mother said, “Stop, you’re getting a bull neck!” That sublimated sex drive opened doors in later life.

A Youngster Grows Up—

I was thirty-years-old before discovering that females found me attractive. Like a turtle slowly coming out of its shell, I began experimenting with this new-found power. Becoming a lawyer accelerated the experimentation…and the attraction.

One young woman taught me that my inherent shyness was hindering the excitement of love-making when she tactfully asked, “Don’t you ever talk when making love?” I was forty-years-old, for crying out loud! Forty! But I learned a valuable lesson about sex. Spin fantasies, be blunt about what you’re experiencing. You’re never too old to learn…even about sex.

One incident during my hippie lawyer years exposed me to the world of spouse-swapping. In our hippie garb, this leather-clad, long-haired lawyer and two or three lovely young women of my acquaintance entered a notorious swapping club. Around the dance floor sat a number of straight-looking couples, at least half of whom probably didn’t want to be there. The curt waitress who served our drinks clearly felt these hippies didn’t belong there.

We were watched by the couples frozen at their tables. We slowly danced and sexily circled around each other. We were the show and knew it. When I paid the bill, I laid a big tip on the waitress who was obviously completely stunned. In just seconds, the manager appeared, obsequious to a fault, to invite us to come again. We never did, but it was an interesting learning experience.

Then there was the time when, as a well-muscled lawyer whose compulsive nature led me to being offered to teach pottery on weekends, I jumped at the chance. I’d observed that most of the students were females between 18 and 40. I was like a kid with unlimited credit in a candy store.

Needless to say, I acquired a reputation as a ladies man. That reputation not only introduced me to several wonderful women but it nearly cost me the love of my life. I learned that sexuality is a double-edged sword: it can bring great pleasure, but it can destroy as well. As I said, you’re never too old to learn. All it takes is paying attention.

Now I’m an old man basking in memories of earlier years. My lovely wife of nearly forty years visits me and is my strong right arm doing for me what I can no longer do for myself. Sex is past, but remembrance fills my days and fuels this blog. I’m glad for the experiences described here and for all the experiences that have filled my life.

Next week is the final part. It’s a thought experiment that may shock some readers but is guaranteed to generate thought. Thinking is always good. Let me know what you think about this part and check out Part 3.

The Weekly Sampler—

As a reminder, go to the Archives on the right side of the page and click on the month and year of that week’s featured Sampler. If you wish, go to the January 15, 2017, blog (“A Simple Reading Assignment”) for more thorough instructions.

If you want to read the entire piece, simply click on the box titled “Continue Reading.” When you want to read the next piece, simply swipe your cursor across the one you have been reading and you will find the next one. Do this every time you want to read the next piece.

Don’t miss the Comments and my replies. Even though the Sampler pieces are from the past, feel free to comment…or not.

Go to the Archives on the right side. Click on February 2015



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    • Arthur Ulene on May 21, 2017 at 17:19

    Warm and wonderful. Thanks for sharing.. :Looking forward to next week’s post….. Art

      • Don Bay on May 21, 2017 at 18:00

      I hope Part 2 allowed you to scratch that itch. It wasn’t as salacious as some expected given my active years in the dating era. Now I’m just an old guy who gets his kicks sitting in the warm sun after the cold winter. Times change. Sigh…

  1. We all have our stories, don’t we? Thanks for sharing yours. I sure never “peed my pants” doing any playground stuff. And sex can be great and it can be deadly, and we all fall somewhere in the spectrum, maybe at one place in the spectrum at one point and a totally different place at another, and the place in the spectrum may or may not be partner specific.

    Looking forward to part 3.

      • Don Bay on May 22, 2017 at 06:56

      You are right. Everybody is unique; we each have our own role to play.

      Part 3 of this series is a thought experiment. My aim is to foster thought. Fingers crossed I succeed.

    • Donna Boe on May 21, 2017 at 23:59

    I’m trying hard to imagine you as a “leather-clad, long-haired lawyer” and can’t quite manage it. I guess we are all different people at various times of our lives.

      • Don Bay on May 22, 2017 at 07:04

      Join the club. Bay the hippie lawyer is hard to imagine. It was possibly the happiest time in my life: saving lives and shocking the straight folks. We all have certain roles at certain times in our lives, some more, some less. As I often say, the one unchanging thing in the universe is change. Maybe there’s a story worth exploring there.

  2. Just have to jump in again. I can totally imagine Don the hippie, partly because his wife told us.

      • Don Bay on May 22, 2017 at 18:31

      It really happened. My draft clients didn’t relate to me in a suit. As a matter of fact, the hippie part of me came out of the closet screaming, “Free at last, free at last, thank the Lord, I’m free at last!

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